collegewithcaitlyn

I think college students, us girls especially, focus on how single we are around the new year (New Year’s kiss anyone?) and the dreaded Valentine’s day. Or Single’s Awareness day as some satirists dubbed it.

Don’t get me wrong, the idea of Valentine’s day is great! It’s always nice to show the person you love how much they mean to you, but it also makes people who aren’t romantically involved (*cough cough*) feel the tiniest bit crappy. Okay, maybe really crappy.

There’s always those movements around this time of year to forget about needing a partner and celebrate yourself (which yas, you do that!), but it can be hard when you actually want to be in a relationship. Like yes, I love myself and I know I don’t need a man to complete me, but that doesn’t mean I don’t want one. Like I said in arecent post, I’m a relationship person down to my core, so I’m always on the prowl -- I mean, trying to meet as many new boys as possible.

And dear Lord have there been some super awkward and uncomfortable situations. I could write a whole book about all of the embarrassing things that have happened to me just in college alone that involve boys.

People don’t really tell you what it’s like to be single in college, especially not when you’re looking for more than just a casual thing, so today I’m going to give you some amusement and share, from my experience, what it’s really like to be single in college.

Sometimes it'll be genuine complaining, but most of the time it'll be comedic complaints."I haven't washed my hair in four days, no wonder I'm single!"

I honestly think the best thing about being single is complaining about being single. I have a shirt that says “Single all the way” and it’s legit one of my favorite shirts. It’s just fun to make fun of yourself sometimes. Plus, then it lets all the cute boys know I'm available. Like, hey what's up hello!

One great thing about being single in college, is that then you get to spend more time with your best friends. I mean, obviously you can still hang out with them even if you are in a relationship, but from what I’ve noticed, girls in relationships spend a lot less time with their friends than single girls do.

And one of the best girl talk subjects has got to be cute boys. Like you can never go wrong with a conversation about that. Also, you know you're finally "real" friends with someone if you talk about cute guys, like that's just a rule.

For some reason, people like to jump to the conclusion that you're actually anything but straight if you haven't been in a relationship for a long time. (I'm sorry I can't find a nice boy willing to date me okay?) But the suspicions get even greater when you and your bestie start doing literally everything together and cuddling when other people are around and calling each other babe and saying, "I love you." And then you constantly have to tell people that no, you actually aren't dating.

I wouldn’t say you’re lonely in college if you’re single, because that’s not true, but you certainly do spend more time alone - even if you do have a ton of friends. And there’s absolutely nothing wrong with spending some time to yourself.

Spending more time alone is something I believe to be extremely vital and beneficial, especially during college. College is a time of growing up, becoming a real adult, and figuring out what you want in your life. Which personally, I think is a lot easier to do if you’re unattached to anyone.

Okay, maybe you don’t actually go on a date with anyone from the dating app/website, but almost every single girl I know has made an account on one and at least looked at potential baes. I mean when you’re that single, looking at a basically unlimited amount of cute boys is a pretty dang tempting option.

I’ve also known girls who don’t download apps like Tinder or Bumble themselves, but they’ll watch their friends swipe left and right and get sad when a boy they thought was hot get a left swipe. (#guilty)

Story time:Just last semester I was eating alone in the dining hall when a very awkward (but sweet, I’ll give him that) boy came up to me and started making conversation. And then out of nowhere asked me out. I blurted out “I have a boyfriend,” and sped away as fast as I could. And I wasn’t even finished eating yet, gosh dang it.

Like props to the kid for having the guts to do it, it made me feel pretty cool that someone would want to ask me out, but you were just not my type.

If you follow me onInstathen you probs know how avid of sunset enthusiast I am, but I’m also a sunrise lover too. One of my bigger motivators to make sure I don’t hit snooze on my alarm is so that I can see the sunset before class. If I get lucky, I’ll even get to watch it while walking to class instead of having to keep peeking out my dorm window every couple minutes to make sure I don’t miss anything exciting.

I do have to say that my favorite thing about having such early classes is that then I feel like I have more free time in the day. It took me a while to figure out why this was, but then I realized it’s because nothing is hanging over my head that I have to worry about doing later (ie. going to more classes) and because the earlier you wake up the more of the day you have to live. Like they say, wake up an hour earlier to live an hour more.

To kind of piggyback off that last one, since you don’t have any classes at night, you’ll (most likely) have nothing keeping you from watching your favorite tv programs! This is really important for me and one of my friends because we watch Dancing with the Stars together every Monday night when it’s on.

Last semester she accidentally scheduled a class in the middle of the show so sometimes she left early if they didn’t get let out early. Save yourself the trouble, and try to take the class earlier in the day. Plus, who wants to be in class after 4 pm anyways?

So you know how drinking coffee is a basic thing to do, and therefore gets made fun of? Or you just get teased because people think you have an addiction? Well, something about college makes basic girls out of all of us doesn’t it? But if you’re waking up early then people seem to judge less about the amount of coffee you drink. Not that I care if you think I drink too much coffee anyways. I don’t.

To get a tad bit sciency for a moment (this never happens), it’s been shown in multiple studies that by waking up early continually that you’ll feel less tired throughout the day. Of course, this also assumes that you go to sleep at a decent hour (no, past midnight is not a decent hour).

I agree with this assertion because last semester I would wake up between 9 and 11 every day and I was so tired all the time, and I couldn’t figure out why for the life of me! Then this semester started, and my alarms through the week only range from 6:00 a.m. and 6:45 a.m., and somehow I manage to feel more energized, even on my long days when I have class from 8:00 to 5:45! And I don’t even get 7 hours of sleep every night!

One thing that I’ve been trying to get into is meditation. I know it sounds a bit hippy and out there, but bear with me here. Meditation’s focus is to just center your focus on the here and now, and to clear your racing mind. This is especially useful in the morning, because it will help you destress before your day even begins and allow you to start it in a great mood.

Plus, it’s a lot easier to do in the early morning because that time of day is associated with peace and quiet. And you'll be forced to be quiet as well since your roommate will still be snoring.

I don’t know about you, but I don’t love large classes. I’m not about anything over 40 students, and less than 20 is the jackpot in my book. If you’re like this too, you should consider taking 8 a.m. classes. Why? Because of their dreaded reputation, most sane college students tend to avoid them like the plague, making the early morning classes less full! Jackpot! Who’s the sane one now?

I’ve always had one or two friends that went to different schools, but as I went into high school and then on to college, the amount of my friends who lived far away from me grew exponentially.

I’m really not a fan of texting, especially not when the person I’m texting is in a different time zone. It makes communicating in real time extremely difficult since you’ll both be doing two totally different things and may have to wait hours for a response. For example, I’m three hours ahead of a lot of my friends, so when I wake up it’s around 6:00 to 9:00 a.m. my time, which means it’s only 3:00 to 6:00 a.m. their time. Basically there’s no way they’re awake yet.

If you try to have a conversation with someone this way, then it may take an hour or two or three to have a conversation that would only like five to ten minutes on the phone. And I know we all have five or ten minutes in our day that we could spare to call a friend.

However, there’s still the issue as to if they don’t pick up, which would have made calling about as effective as texting them, but I’d much rather find a surprise voice mail from a friend than a random text. Sometimes though, I like to spam my friends with tons of text messages at times when I know they can’t get to the phone, so they have something to read and laugh at when they get the time.

Now this presents the same issue of having to find a time that works for both of you, but I think it’s 100 percent worth it because seeing someone’s face and their surroundings makes it feel like you’re actually together.

Rabbit is an online video chatting application that allows you to share screens with those in your “room” with you! Basically, you can stream Netflix, YouTube, Hulu, and Amazon video together or just browse the Internet.

Just two days ago I was Rabbiting with my friend Emma who lives 2,200 miles away from me. We started American Horror Story together back in high school, and now we can still watch it together even though we lives states away. Plus, we can see each other while watching it so we can see and hear each other's reactions! We can also chat, but I had the feature disabled during this photo.

Rabbit can be a best testy sometimes, because it only launched back in 2013.The trouble you might have makes for great fun and problem solving with your friend, and nothing beats being able to watch you and your friend’s show together even though you’re actually miles apart.

You can also use Rabbit just to video chat like you would on FaceTime, just with a bigger screen than your phone. Which is why I prefer it over FaceTime.

The great thing about emailing is that it allows your friend to reply on their own time, and it’ll guarantee they see it. I mean who doesn’t get their email sent to their phone these days? Plus, it may motivate some people to delete those hundreds or thousands of unread emails they have sitting it their inbox. You know who you are.

I’ve technically never used this to keep in touch with a distant friend, but I used it all the time to stay in contact with my dad when he was deployed overseas.

I honestly can’t decide which I prefer, getting an email or getting a letter in the mail. Probably a real letter, because it’s more personal. You can see their handwriting, and it’s something they once held so it just feels more intimate and special. Plus, one of my friends likes to always doodle on the edges of the paper so it’s even prettier.

There are three downfalls to talking through snail mail though: it takes a few days for your letter to get in your friend’s hands, you have to pay for stamps, and they may forget to send one back.

This one is highly dependent on how far away your friend(s) live from you. Most of my friends in different states live over 1,000 miles away so it’s not plausible for me to visit more than once as the broke college student I am.

What I did my freshman year was to go back to visit during my winter break and then over summer just visit solely one friend. But that broke my bank account, so that didn't happen this year and probably won’t again.

Instead, I stayed home to work over winter break and I’m going to visit my friends over summer, and then have one of them take their turn to come visit me. Basically my plan now is to alternate with my friends on who is traveling to visit who and if I’m visiting all my friends, or just one.

For my friends who live closer, like only a state away, I see them about three to four times a year (besides when I see them during the semester). They’re about an hour to three hours drives away, so whoever is more comfortable driving does so, but they’re usually more casual short lived things like a night out, a trip to the skating rink and then a sleepover.

Speaking of friends, I consider all of you my friends! And I would love to get to know each one of you better, so I would love it if you filled out the survey I made! Just clickhere to fill it out now!

Have you ever been out and seen a cute couple eating together at a restaurant or sharing popcorn at the movies, and thought about how you wish you had someone to takeyouout on a date?

I know that in my very essence I’m a relationship person. I can tell because I love doing things for other people just to make their day and see them smile. I love planning elaborate surprises and planning gifts for half a year just to make sure they’re perfect. Quality relationship material I do think so myself.

But, I haven’t been in a relationship in months. Well, not a romantic one anyways. And sure, it feels just as great to do all these things for my friends, but sometimes I want someone to do something elaborate for me too. I’m not saying my friends don’t, but I can’t always count on others to bring me happiness.

Before I came to college it was almost unheard of for me to go out alone (unless it was shopping, duh). I didn’t want to look stupid. But then I moved across the country to go to college and wassuddenly without my trusted movie buddy. Iwas faced with a decision: either not seeing the new movie I had been dyingto see, or suckit up and just go alone.

That one self date made me fall in love. Now I actually prefer going to the movies alone, and actually went last week to finally seeFantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them.

I've also taken myself out to brunch and lunch. Now, I just have to step it up a notch and take myself out to dinner, because we all know dinner time is the real date time.

Sure, I got some weird looks each time I went out to eat alone, and each time I go out alone, I always have to explain to the host that I'm not waiting for anyone and that I'm ready for a table, but I don't mind anymore. I revel in that moment of them realizing I'm confident enough to go out alone.

Besides going to see movies alone and eating out alone, I also want to start going places like museums, little coffee shops and other places alone, too.

Coming up with real date ideas is hard enough, so I totally understand how coming up with self-date ideas could be even more difficult! I mean you can't go bowling or putt-putting solo; some things are just too insanely weird to do alone and those are two of them.

I know some people can feel uncomfortable at first when they take themselves out, but it felt natural to me. I’ve always been a very independent person, so I think that’s another reason I’m so passionate about “dating” myself. I want to be okay with being alone and be comfortable doing things on my own. So while taking yourself out can improve your self-confidence itself, it can also expand your level of comfort with doing things without help.

Think about it. When you’re with someone else and you go out, you both can lean on each other to figure out any problems or issues you run into. Say you get lost downtown, but if you’re alone, you have to grow comfortable with going up to a stranger and asking for help without a crutch.

So recap: self dates not only help you grow your self-confidence, but also your level of independence. Plus, they boost your mood because they're just plain fun.

Have you ever taken yourself on a date? If so, what did you do? If not, why? And would you be willing to go on one? Let me know in the comments below!

I've been back to school for a week now, so I thought it was about time I shared my goals for this semester. I did a post like thislast semesterand it seemed to go over well real with y'all so I thought I'd do it every semester! (Plus then it keeps me extra accountable on achieving my goals!)

Basically achieve at least 3.6 GPA again. This may be a little harder since I'm taking two high-level math classes and my first real programming class, but I think I can do it! I've had a week of the classes already, and my professors are lovely so if I ever need help I'll be in good hands.

I fell in love with spin this past semester, but I really want to get into a new class as well. Right now I have my eyes on this barre-lates class. (Kind of like ballet and pilates mixed.) I guess we'll see how that goes!

I'm the kind of person who gets stressed out when my area is dirty and cluttered, so I really want to keep up with this goal. I kind of failed at this last semester because I ran out of paper towels and was too cheap to buy more and I only had two rags to clean with, but they were always in my dirty laundry, so I could never use them.

So, goal: clean the bathroom, vacuum, and take the trash/recycle out every week.Stay off my phone in classI was awful about this last semester. Like I would walk straight into my stats class, pull out my notebook and pens, then go straight to Twitter. Yup, I'm not letting that happen again. I've done a pretty good job so far this first week of school, but hopefully I can keep it up in the long run, too!

I nailed this goal last semester, and I know I can do it again. I just chose to include it here to make myself really accountable. I will not fail!

This is pretty similar to the "not saving all my homework until Sunday" goal from last semester, just a tad different. With the last goal I could have waited until Saturday (loophole!), but with this one I'm pushing myself to get it done with 48 hours of it being assigned. Or at least starting on it if it's something like a project.

Books take up a huge part of my life, but they kind of disappeared when college started for me. I hoping that if I make this a goal that I'll keep reading, and maybe even get a library card for the local library. I mean I love buying books, but they can be pretty pricey.

I've already pre-paid for a whole slew of meals and snacks before the semester even starts, so when I get to the end and find out I didn't use it all I feel like it's money wasted! All the meal plans at my school are basically the same price, so I can't change it to a lesser meal plan and save money. Last semester I could tell I just bought too much groceries and was more compelled to eat those than my school's food that I had pre-paid for. Basically, that was money I didn't have to spend on groceries and could have saved!

I'm normally really good this at this, but when spring semester hit last school year I never wanted to leave my room to make the walk to the laundry room. I mean it was freezing and getting dressed to just do laundry wasn't really on my list of things I wanted to do. But I'm determined to stay up with laundry this semester! Having an overflowing hamper is just an eyesore and smelly, and nobody wants that in their dorm room.

Two years ago today I didn't have a single social media app on my phone. Not because I didn't use them, but because I was challenged to stay off social media for a month.

That challenge taught me I'mliterallyaddicted to my phone, and I worry too much about other people's lives and what they think about mine. Since then, I've tried to stay off my phone as much as possible, but somehow in the past year, I've started using it even more than before. I know it's partly because I started my blog, since promoting it on social media is obviously necessary, but it's also because I'd been sucked further into the black hole.

I feel pressured to post on Instagram everyday, and like I need to watch everyone's Snapchat and Instagram stories (ugh, so much effort). I know I'm not the only one who's addicted to their phone and social media either. My little sister will flip out if her phone isn't within five feet of her, and if she's showing me something on her phone she won't even let me hold it. I have friends who endlessly scroll their Facebook all day staring at videos of cute animals and strongly opinionated statuses. I can tell more than just the people I know are addicted to their phone and its Twitter and Instagram apps, because when I go out to eat I swear that everyone is on their phones and not talking.

Now, I'm not trying to get you off social media completely, not at all. I'm just trying to help you overcome your addiction while I battle mine as well. We're in this together!

Basically, the rules are to only go on a social media app if I have a legit purpose to be on it. Things like promoting a new blog post, sharing something so great I can't keep it to myself, to look up a picture, to find inspiration, or to social media stalk someone (don't judge - I know you do it, too).

I love social media, I really do. But it's a necessary evil and people need to understand that. Yes, it helps promote business and bring you closer to people across the world and gives you inspiration, but it also creates stress to curate the perfect pictures and tweets. Sometimes I don't even realize how stressed out it makes me until I don't use it for a day or more.

Basically, if you feel like your phone is a literal part of you, and you no longer want to be a cyborg, I recommend going on a social media detox with me.

It doesn't have to be anything intense like a whole month without social media or even what I'm doing now, it could just be something simple like going a day without it or only letting yourself use social media for an hour or two a day. You could just make a goal to not watch any stories or to only look at the tweets that "happened while you were away" instead of going through your whole feed. There are so many different variations of social media detoxes that there is bound to be one that works for you.

It's New Year's, which means it's that time of year when we all make a resolution that we forget about in two weeks. No need to feel ashamed of that, because we've all been there! But as 2016 came to a close, I realized I was still going strong with the resolution I had made myself at the beginning of the year.

Keeping a gratitude journal like this is such a great way to improve your mental state of mind. Writing down what makes you happy, helps you to remember it, and by omitting the negative things, you're diminishing their power over your emotions. Basically, writing down what makes you happy instantly makes you happier, and helps you stay that way in the long run.

I have absolutely no idea where I got the idea for this little project, but I loved doing it so much. Yes, some days I forgot to do it, or was too exhausted to do it the same day so I had to do it the next morning, but it was worth it.

One thing I did notice the first month was that I was letting how much I had written each day affect my mood. I thought that if I had written less than five or so things that it meant I had a sad and boring life. I got a little stressed and tried to create superficial "happy" experiences just so I had more to write in my journal. Then I realized quanity isn't nearly as important as quality. I could have 20 mediocre things to write, or I could have five crazy exceptional things to write about and you can bet that I would prefer the latter.

Not only did my gratitude journal teach me quality over quantity, but it also showed me that I have so much more to be happy for than I thought.

When something positive happens, I tend to gloss over and forget about it, but when something negative happens I can't stop thinking about it. Since I end up thinking more about the negative things in life, it seems like there are more negative aspects of my life than there are negative.

It may seem like a waste of time or a pain to have to take the time out of your day to jot down just a few simple things, but I promise you it's life changing.

Plus, it really is amazingly simple. I'm sure you'd get the same outcomes as me even if you just wrote down one thing per day of the year. I mean, that's still 365 things that make you happy!

I really think this was my best New Year's resolution ever, and I doubt I'm ever going to be able to top it. I still don't know what my resolution for this year is going to be, but you can bet I'm going to be continuing this and making it a tradition! I mean, how cool will it be to look back on these in a few years from now?

Have you ever kept a gratitude journal? What was your best New Year's resolution? What's your resolution for the year? Let me know in the comments below!